Look out world. Joe Satriani and his magnum opus Professor Satchafunkilus and the Musterion of Rock have arrived. Entering the lol inducing elite of artists who simply can’t have any honest mates. It's up there with other luminaries such has John Frucsiante's To Record Water for Ten Days, who can forget Limp Bizkit's Chocolate Starfish and The Hot Dog Flavored Water and Supergrass have given us laughter fuel by calling their latest album Diamond Hoo Haa.
I'm struggling to think of one that is worse than "The Satch" though. Why you ask? Well several reasons. Firstly the ridiculous name he's given himself. Does he expect that to transfer to everyday life? "Can I book a table for tonight? Name? It’s Professor Satchafunkilus. That's P-R-O.....” Another bone of contention is his use of the word "Musterion". After a quick bit of Google action I found the literal translation of Musterion refers to that "cannot be known unless it is revealed" (http://isv.org/musings/musing12.htm). This kind of implies that he alone has the secret of rock music. As you might agree this is a pretty bold statement, one that annoyed me a bit.
Although not as annoying waking up in a bed covered in shite from a Chihuahua. Oh yes, I experienced such shock just last Sunday. I don't think you ever experienced terror unless you've woken up to the site of liquid dog crap on your pillow. The fact that I jumped out of bed straight into another pile of it, only adds insult to injury. Take your worst Monday morning and times it by ten, still worse.
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